Being satisfied.....

I have been blessed to have people in my life who know how to get things done and push me to do the same. People like Gina who are teaching me to live from sufficiency and remind me that in order to be an asset to my community and family I must rethink “banking my energy”. This last week has been crazy. I had doctor’s appointments, my son had doc appts, my hubby had appts…. my massage therapist is now unavailable due to a blown out knee….everybody I come in contact with needs a doc after being with me….jeez….

….I have been inundated with work this past week….grading papers and completing my own assignments and I have been ignoring my body. I have gone back to some old habits of not telling people no and so when I think I am “banking my energy” I think I am o.k……hahaha…..not so!! I need to just rest….live from sufficiency and know that it will be o.k. Tell people no without feeling guilty. I must learn to call on friends more, not feel like I am bothering people AND not feel so pitiful…some days I think I should be further ahead in my recovery than I am….and I guess if I didn’t develop edema I would have been, but rest is what I require…..I feel unproductive and mundane but intellectually it’s what I need….

School is almost over for my kids and I can’t wait….I can’t wait to get away from all of the negativity that has swirled around their school community….my surgery was a blessing in that I have not had to deal with it too much as I do not have to go to the school much….oh but when I do…..sometimes Christians make me wanna puke….some of the people I detest can suck the life right out of a room…how do you live your life just being pathetic, insecure and angry? I guess that is one of life’s many mysteries…..

Summer is a time that in the past few years of me working at home I have cherished with my children….we won’t go on a vacation this year but they are going to go to some awesome camps and I will do my best to prepare them for the next grade they will be entering….my oldest is very excited about beginning Jr. High and I cannot believe I will be the mother of a teenager….after all I’m only 21…..

So as my story continues I realize that this is my story and no one can tell it like me, no one can change it but me and no one can own it but me…..I read Philippians 4:6-7, 11-13 where it states not to worry but pray and ask GOD for what you need, give thanks and you will receive. The passages also talk about being satisfied….knowing I can do all things through Christ because he give me strength……my story has SAVED MY LIFE…..