But…..the edema is back. Luckily it’s only on one side so I can live with it. It can be painful at times but as I reflect and if I am being honest, the only thing I can do when I am in agonizing pain is flow through it with Grace and Dignity. My grandmother would tell me, how you climb the highest mountain is just as important as how you get down from the mountain and this life we live is not a dress rehearsal, so each test I am given is also a lesson I am learning. So I will try harder at getting on the treadmill…choose carrots over chips and hopefully this edema will not last long.
How will I be remembered? When I received my diagnosis, this was the question I asked myself….right after the why me question? As we move through this space we call Earth, the legacy we leave will have a lasting impression on those we leave behind. I want to be remembered for my wit and no nonsense attitude….my low tolerance for bull%$#@, my intentional fortitude but through it all being graceful. Now I’m not dying on anyone, so don’t go planning a memorial…..actually just had a check up and I am waiting for the lab results but I feel good, everything is moving correctly, nothing is hanging out where it’s not supposed to be and pointing in the right direction so I have no worries. I am so grateful for what I have and don’t worry about what I don’t have. In a recent conversation with a friend she related how scared she was about growing old. I told her she would be remembered as a worry wart…..let it go!!!I told her, let it fall!!!
Grace to me means letting my face embrace wrinkles, watching my ass drop faster than a speeding bullet, wondering where my collar bone actually used to be, but through the natural aging process I can lose my body, expand my spirit, find my grace…..while SAVING MY LIFE…..
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